Beyond Self Development?

Hey so here’s the thing. We spend all this time working on SELF-development – but how often does it result in same thing different perspective?

What would it look like to actually meet people where THEY’RE at rather than where we’re at? And what would that look like at scale? Well that’s what had me thinking this week!

Leave a comment below, I’d love to hear your thoughts.

Video transcript and relevant links

So, something that I’ve been thinking about recently is this boom we’re having self-development, personal-development in bettering ourselves whether it be through diet or more exercise or improving our emotional intelligence or building resilience.  And I for one think it’s GREAT that this industry is booming, that people are taking a real interest in bettering themselves as human beings. Fantastic! The world needs so much more of that.

But it also occurs to me that there’s a big gap potentially, that we’re not looking at yet, and there’s a huge opportunity here.  That is if you have all these individuals that are doing the work on themselves and working out how to be better human beings, what does that look like when we come together, when we organise and when we gather together in groups?

Because what I see happening very very often is that people go through the transformative experience.  They’ve worked on their communication style, they’ve gone through this program and out the other side of it they’re saying “I’m a better person as a result” but I’m not seeing a tangible shift in the behaviour and how they interact with others.   

What I’m seeing is that there is still this expectation that you as an individual will speak to me as I need to be spoken to and will work with me in a way that I’m still comfortable with – rather than necessarily meeting others where they’re at.

I think that’s the big gap.  So all very well to go and work on ourselves but really that transformation should be about how do we then work together in groups.  And that’s more about how I meet somebody at the level that THEY’RE at, rather than them necessarily coming to me in a way that I’m comfortable or I’m familiar with, or in a way that is in line with all of this new knowledge that I’ve found.

So it’s something that continues to fascinate me.  I came across a little meme that somebody had sent me just last week and they talked about self-care, self-soothing, and structural care – and the difference between those three things.

So you know self-soothing is very much the Netflix and chocolate which I’m sure all of us are familiar with to some degree.  Self-care is doing those things that are really important to us as individuals, like our finances, but maybe it’s not the most fun that week.  And then this concept of structural care, and does it look like to build structures, to build society in a way where people can live and interact as fulfilled human beings. And I think THAT’S the gap that we’ve really got to go after now.  

We have a huge wealth of people that are prepared to help us as individuals, let’s take that next step and say “OK, so what does it look like to organise ourselves scale?” 

Maybe we can start to stem the tide of people who are leaving organisations feeling disenchanted and starting their own thing to get some degree of freedom and control back in their lives.  And actually if you were building a way for people to interact that meant that they could get purpose and they could get fulfilment in a large organisation, then, that would have a real effect.

Because on some level I believe that ultimately human beings are going to have to organise ourselves on a scale that’s greater than 2, 5, 20, even a couple of hundred people.  It’s not going away and so let’s go after that gap around how we’re interacting as more fulfilled, more capable human beings as a whole, rather than focusing on the individual improvement.

I think that’s where the real opportunity lies.

I’m Danelle, from tribe Leadership Retreats, drop us a line below, leave a comment – I’d love to hear your feedback and hear your thoughts.


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